Frustration

I haven't lost a single lb. and haven't lost any inches. WHAT THE FREAKIN' CRAP... I am getting so peeved. I have been working out almost everyday. I didn't work out Sat. or Sunday. But what the freak I am getting so mad, I mean what do I need to do to lose weight. I have even been really trying to watch what I eat. I seriously give up. I mean I have been exercising for an hour to two hours, why won't these inches and lbs. just start coming off. I went from being a couch potatoe to working out and have been trying so hard. I am just getting sooooo frustrated. UGH...

Look on the brightside of life.

Well today was a weigh in day for me. I have decided that Wednesday was my weigh in days. So I measured and I haven't lost any inches, and I gained the four lbs. back but that's okay. Because I know that in the beginning it hardest to lose, and I didn't exercise last week on Thursday, Friday, or Saturday and I ate a lot of goodies because of it being Valentine's weekend. Plus at the Fireside Sunday I ate a few pieces of cake. I always crave goodies, LOL. So nothing lost but that is okay with me. And now I am going to go exercise at Anytime Fitness. Update on looking for my Internship. I may or may not get an Internship with the Teton County Recreation Center in Jackson Hole. I had a phone interview with a lady named Jill at the Center today, and she asked if I had any questions and I asked if I could come over there and go for a tour around the center and get a feel for the place. I am going over there on March 1st to take a tour of the place and have more interviews. :) So there is nothing set in stone, but I will check it out and see if it is something that I want to do. I would love to work in Jackson. It is so pretty there, I haven't been there in a few years, but I love it there. And it would be cool, because I would be able to use the facility on my days off. :) So pray for me that I might be able to get this. I wouldn't start til June til the middle of August which would be perfect. I hope things fall into place if not I am sure I will find the one that I am supposed to do.

Children of our Heavenly Father.

Went to a fireside this evening, and I loved a lot of the things that Brother Hammond said. He talked about how he was thinking about what he was needing to say to us as Single Adults. He told us to remember that we are children of God. And to not get so caught up on the things that we wished we were doing. But to think of ourselves as Sons and Daughters of God. I know that a lot of times that I get so wrapped up in the things that I am doing now, and thinking oh my heck I am so down in the dumps because I am still at my parents house, in tons and tons of debt and hoping that things will get better. But I love the fact that I can be here with my parents. They are loving people in a lot of ways and I really do not have a horrible life. I mean some days I do hate it here, because my parents all they seem to want to do is watch t.v. But I do have a good family. I was happy when he talked about how we all need to think that we are greater than we think we are. There are times that I don't think much of myself. I am going to really work on that. Because I know that I am a daughter of God. That Heavenly Father thinks of me, and that he wants me to do really good things in my life. :) I love Heavenly Father and am so happy that he gave us the chance to come to earth and work towards getting back into Heaven someday. I know that I am not perfect, but it's my imperfections that make me interesting and that make it so that I strive to do better each day.

Living, losing, Finding.

Currently my BMI, is 39.5. Wowsa's I knew it was bad. But I am keeping Wednesdays as my day to do a measurement of my body. Yesterday I measured and my Chest was 44 and 3/4 and my waist and butt was 50 and 3/4. My weight was 216. Already I have lost some weight since I last weighed myself. Last week when I weighed myself I was 220. So four lbs. down. I am going to lose weight this year. I am excited to keep track. I know that there will be good days and a lot of bad hard days. But I just want to not be lagging and I want to have energy. I hope to have a cute body for the summer.
Also, I am still searching for an Internship. I wish I was more prepared than just searching for one. I need to get myself motivated to get this Internship done so that I can find a good job doing something fun and motivating. I love photography too so I hope that I can find something to do with photography. I so hate being where it's cold cuz I want to go out and take pics but being that it's been freezing outside it's hard to say Hey friends lets go out and take pics' in these freezing cold temperatures. You know you want to ha ha. Wish me luck on finding an internship so that I can get a diploma.

Motivation

I didn't want to go exercise yesterday at all. When I went to work around five last night I was lagging so bad. Then I was leaving work and was so tired that my whole body just felt like I was ready to just pass out. I didn't want to go to Anytime Fitness at all, but I told my friend Liz that I was totally going to meet her there. I don't ever want to go back on my promises. So I went and got a Subway Sandwich, I got a foot long and ate a half of it and then went and worked out. I at first hated being there and I am sure that I a was a grump. I started out on the machines doing arms and doing legs, then I went and did I have no idea how many minutes on the bike, then I got on the Elliptical machine. I was there at the gym for two hours. I am saying go me, considering I didn't even want to go there. LOL. So I was on the elliptical and I was watching What Not To Wear and my time on the machine ended but I had to wait to see what the girl looked like with her hair cut and with her make up done and with her new outfit so I kept adding more time on the machine. So I have no clue how many calories I actually burned. But It felt awesome to get on there and just go and go and go. Though I hate working out on the machines. I would much rather work out in the great outdoors, hiking and canoeing or doing things that are outdoors so that I don't see four walls. But I am going to keep at it. Go Me. That's my motivation for myself. Ha ha.

To lose will be to Win.

I have decided that I need to just make myself feel better somehow. I am always in a lot of pain. Right now my back as I am even sitting here, my lower back is throbbing and it is going all the way down my right leg. I know I have to lose weight. I started working at Any Time Fitness again, so that means that I get to go workout everyday. Saturday I had no motivation to even get dressed because I am in so much pain. I have three odd jobs that I have to go to, so I am hoping that I can at least get myself out and doing more. I have decided that I need to start doing more around the house as well and that will get me up and moving. I need to lose a lot of weight, and I am hoping that by me exercising I will be able to get out there and that I can just even start losing some weight. Being as I was in the wheelchair for such a long while was no good so I need to get all this weight off me. I need motivation at times. So off I go to eat my breakfast and then wait a little bit and then I am off to the gym. ;0) Wish me luck on losing weight, so that I can feel better.